I’m taking a little break from Ephesians, which I will pick back up next week.
Michael came home one day this week, I forget which one, and talked to me about staying home this Sunday, like we did on Mother’s Day. He was saying it more for me than for him because I’ve just been extra sensitive lately, what with Mother’s Day just last month and my birthday this week, and he thought it might not be good for me to be exposed to the public on this particular day.
And I wasn’t sure I totally agreed with him until I went shopping for a Father’s Day card for him. He got me the most amazing heartfelt card for Mother’s Day, and I wanted to do the same for him. But it was hard. Picking up card after card that talked about how good that dad was with the kids, knowing that Michael hasn’t had that chance yet. I finally found a card that centered more around family than fatherhood, as well as a card from the dogs (thank you for whoever decided to start making those).
I was at dinner with Michael last night for my birthday (since my birthday falls in the week and not the weekend), and I took the opportunity to thank him. He has been so supportive and open to understanding what I am going through. I know that the loss of our daughters affected him differently than it affected me, but he has sat with me every time I cried. He walks with me through the uncomfortable moments. And it means the most to me when he just gets it, not because he understands personally, but that he strives to learn by listening.
And that just frustrates me more that his daughters aren’t here to celebrate him tomorrow. He is an amazing father and will be an amazing father to any other kids that enter into our lives.
Father’s Day has always been special to me. I was born on a Father’s Day. I have an incredible dad. I have a great father-in-law (who is loving and kind even though he has dementia). I have had several mentors in my life who have been father-like to me. I’m thankful for all of them. And of course, I’m thankful for my Heavenly Father who is with me daily.
I look forward to the day when my husband can be celebrated by his children as well. But until then, we will continue leaning on each other and leaning on our Heavenly Father who walks with us.