Tag Archives: finding worth in God

The Worth of Others

Recently, in our area, a young teenage boy took his own life due to bullying.  It breaks my heart that someone so young would believe he was hated so much, believe there was no hope for him, and believe that the only choice he had was to end his life so early.  There have been a lot conversations in our neighborhoods and in the media about bullying and what we as a society can do to prevent things like this from happening.

I mentioned in a previous post about realizing my worth in God, that he loves me so much that he would sacrifice his own son so that I could have a chance at a relationship with Him.  But I tend to stop there.  I want to live my life in a closer relationship with God, and I can get so inward focused that I lose sight of the next logical step.

If I’m worth that much to God, because I was created by him that means that everyone that was created by him is worth that much.  That means every person on this earth is worth the redemption of Christ and a chance to have a relationship with God.

That seems overwhelming. However, I don’t think God is tasking any one person to love every person in the world, but I do think that He is calling us to love every person in our life.  For some people in our lives, that’s easy.  It’s easy to love those who think like us, who live like us, and who talk like us.

But it’s the people who aren’t like us, who disagree with us, who lead lives that we don’t understand, who attack and criticize us for who we are, that we tend to avoid.  It’s easy to unfriend, delete, block or isolate ourselves from these kinds of people, but I believe God put these people, these opportunities for love, into our lives for a reason.

When we were still sinners, Christ died for us.  When we were still unlovable, angry, critical, judgmental.  When we didn’t live our lives in a way that honored God.  When we were the kind of people God should isolate himself from, He still came into our lives and loved us anyway.  Why should we be any different to the people around us?

We don’t love them so that they will do better in their lives.  We aren’t in relationship with them to control their behavior or convert them to our way of thinking.  We give them the same worth that God gives to us.  We love them unconditionally so that they will know God.   God gave us his love to share with others, not to keep to ourselves.

The tragedies in our community are a blatant cry for the love of God and the desire to know our true worth in a cruel and deceiving world.  As Christians, we are called to remind others of the truth through our compassion, our love, our words and actions to everyone we meet, lift each other up when we fall, and encourage each other along our journey in this life.

An Announcement of Emotions

I have hesitated about making a formal announcement regarding this for a while, going back and forth several times.  But I feel like it would be best to come clean so that I’m not misleading anyone in future posts.  The announcement is I am pregnant, and I’m due in early Spring.

The day I got the positive test, I had three distinct emotions.  The first was, of course, elation – mixed with gratitude and excitement.  I remember being so happy that I started crying in convulsions.  My poor sweet puppy had no idea why I was sitting on the floor, leaning against the window in my office with tears flowing down my face.  She probably thought I was going crazy.

The next emotion was fear, but more like fear with hope and peace still attached to it.  I was afraid I would miscarry again, but it wasn’t for a lack in faith of what God could do.  It was quite the opposite.  I knew that God was with me in my last miscarriage.  The things he has done for me in the last year, the purpose he renewed in me, gave me unimaginable joy and a peace that passed all understanding.  It allowed me to speak to those who were silently grieving.  It opened my eyes to the injustices of life and who we can be to each other, both good and bad.  The biggest realization was that we are not guaranteed a certain outcome to our life, just that God will be there every step of the way.  If I had another miscarriage, I knew God would be there, that my purpose would still be intact.  If I was able to carry to full term and have a healthy child, God would be there also, and my purpose would be intact.  It was the not knowing which way it was going to go that was the problem.

However, knowing now that I am on a new path (every day is now new as I have never been this pregnant before), it has brought another emotion.  This final emotion is guilt.  When I opened up about my miscarriage and struggle, I was met with so many other stories from women who I respect and admire, who are still in that struggle.  These are women who I honestly believe will become amazing mothers some day.  However, they are doing amazing things with their lives in the present as well, showing me that purpose is not dictated by societal timelines, but by God alone.

Still, I know what it’s like to get the pregnancy announcements on Facebook, or in an email, or in person.  I know what it’s like to watch bellies grow as I felt more and more left behind.  I know what it’s like to have well-meaning friends try to connect with me, only to have the conversation turn to baby/kid talk unintentionally.  Not that I hated discussing the adorable children around me, it’s just that it made my missing ones that much more apparent.

I don’t want to blindly take hold of my mommy card and jump on this path to never look back.  I want to continue addressing this issue we seem to have with women without children, whether by choice or not.  We either use them up or treat them as useless.  They deserve neither.  They deserve to say they are tired or overworked without the constant comment or look that says “just wait til you have kids”.  They deserve to be included in conversations and activities because we are all women dealing with life together.  And ultimately, they deserve to be considered worthy in the kingdom of God.  Because they are.

I don’t know where this pregnancy will take me, but I know that if I am blessed with children of my own, I want to teach them that no matter what path they are on, God has a purpose for them.  Just as He has as purpose for all of you.