Tag Archives: husband

This Father’s Day

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I’m taking a little break from Ephesians, which I will pick back up next week.

FathersDay

Michael came home one day this week, I forget which one, and talked to me about staying home this Sunday, like we did on Mother’s Day.  He was saying it more for me than for him because I’ve just been extra sensitive lately, what with Mother’s Day just last month and my birthday this week, and he thought it might not be good for me to be exposed to the public on this particular day.

And I wasn’t sure I totally agreed with him until I went shopping for a Father’s Day card for him.  He got me the most amazing heartfelt card for Mother’s Day, and I wanted to do the same for him.  But it was hard.  Picking up card after card that talked about how good that dad was with the kids, knowing that Michael hasn’t had that chance yet.  I finally found a card that centered more around family than fatherhood, as well as a card from the dogs (thank you for whoever decided to start making those).

I was at dinner with Michael last night for my birthday (since my birthday falls in the week and not the weekend), and I took the opportunity to thank him.  He has been so supportive and open to understanding what I am going through.  I know that the loss of our daughters affected him differently than it affected me, but he has sat with me every time I cried.  He walks with me through the uncomfortable moments.  And it means the most to me when he just gets it, not because he understands personally, but that he strives to learn by listening.

And that just frustrates me more that his daughters aren’t here to celebrate him tomorrow.  He is an amazing father and will be an amazing father to any other kids that enter into our lives.

Father’s Day has always been special to me.  I was born on a Father’s Day.  I have an incredible dad.  I have a great father-in-law (who is loving and kind even though he has dementia).  I have had several mentors in my life who have been father-like to me.  I’m thankful for all of them.  And of course, I’m thankful for my Heavenly Father who is with me daily.

I look forward to the day when my husband can be celebrated by his children as well. But until then, we will continue leaning on each other and leaning on our Heavenly Father who walks with us.

Peace

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I can’t believe it’s the end of the month, especially this month.  Life has been chaotic, uncertain, and just simply crazy.  I should have known it was going to be crazy since it started with Michael coming home with the stomach bug (which I never, thankfully, got).  As I’m now in full swing of my second trimester, my brain is ready to make all sorts of decisions that are just not makeable at the moment, which brought some unneeded and definitely unwanted stress. 

While I can’t go into details about it, I wanted to share something pretty incredible.  One day in this month, I wrote out all of the things I was worried about, just so I would get them out of my head.  Literally, eight days later, all of the things I was worried about had some answer to them.  Granted, some of them were “wait until such and such happens,” but it wasn’t this big unknown void that I felt I was standing in front of anymore.  Actual plans and options started to materialize with little work from me.

This month, in our small group, we each shared one word needs that we could pray for each other.  My word was peace.  Well, Michael took that word and ran with it.  Every morning, he prayed that I would have peace in that day, no matter what was happening.  To say he’s been amazing throughout this pregnancy would be an understatement.  He goes above and beyond for me every day, even if his own day was particularly stressful.  Even though we have always been a team in our marriage, it feels like it’s morphed into this super-team.  Without a word, we just seem to pick up the slack for one another and support each other every day.  I’ve never felt closer to him, and I can tell it’s made a difference to me in my own life.  I feel more relaxed…more, at peace.

But this feeling of peace has gone beyond the circle of my marriage.  I feel it in my community as well.  Every conversation I have has been so uplifting.  We’ve received so many unexpected blessings from people, that I can’t even begin to recount all of them.  I have been encouraged in any future decisions that whatever I decide, I have a force of people surrounding me, ready to be in my corner no matter what.

Even though my husband and my community have given me more peace that I could have imagined, I know that all of this is really a gift from God.  He has answered my prayers over and over again.  He has made his presence known, even in my most oblivious moments.  I can’t glorify and thank him enough for the peace he has given me over these past two years, and continues to grant me throughout these transitions in my life.  I don’t feel like I deserve the things he’s given my little family this month, and I’m just in awe of it all.  He is truly the one in control, and for that I am totally thankful, and at peace.