Something To Remember For The Holidays

I’m writing this week more for myself than for anyone else.  But every now and then you need a reminder of this reality, but I think it’s especially hard to remember going into the holidays at the end of the year. It’s okay to not be okay. I think about those people who have lost… Continue reading Something To Remember For The Holidays

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Another Step in the Journey of a Miscarriage

I haven’t really talked lately about what has been going on in my journey to become a parent.  Waiting on God’s timing can be a very frustrating experience, as I’m sure all of you know.  That biological clock is no joke. Losing my daughter is always in the back of my head.  I wonder in… Continue reading Another Step in the Journey of a Miscarriage

Mother’s Day

With Mother’s Day coming up, I’ve spent a lot of time in reflection this past couple of weeks.  Recently, I was asked if it bothers me that all the women of the Bible who suffered with infertility ended up having babies.  The short answer is no.  Just the fact that these stories were included in… Continue reading Mother’s Day

Today

Today is my due date.  Was my due date.  Today was supposed to be met with excitement, nervousness and anticipation, but instead it’s met with reminders of my grief, loss and empty womb.  Though I thought my world was going to stop today, the sun still came up, people are still on the roads going… Continue reading Today

The Journey of Worth

Having a miscarriage evokes a lot of feelings.  Grief.  Loss.  Pain, both emotional and physical.  Frustration.  Confusion.  There are a lot of lessons I've learned as well, and I'm so grateful and encouraged by all the connections I've made on this path. I feel like God prepared me a lot for this season in my… Continue reading The Journey of Worth

Letting Go

I love my husband. You guys don't even know half of the amazing things this man has done for me through the course of our courtship and marriage, but especially in the last two months. We have become so much closer over the last year than we ever had before, and I'm so grateful for… Continue reading Letting Go

Scars

When I was three, I was in a car accident.  My dad, mom, baby brother and I were headed either to or from home during the holidays.  My parents told me that a semi truck knocked our car off the road, and it slid down an embankment, turned upside down and spun to a stop. … Continue reading Scars

The Grieving Process

One of the common responses I received from people in our life who have supported and loved us in this experience was “Grieve how you need to grieve.” I’m a pretty blunt person, so I didn’t think this would be a problem. However, it wasn’t the temptation to hide how I was feeling, it was… Continue reading The Grieving Process

Grief, Loss and Thanksgiving: Part Two

Part 2: Tuesday the 25th and Wednesday the 26th – WARNING, this will get graphic and detailed.  I will not blame you if you skip this post. Tuesday went by in a slow blur.  Michael took care of every meal, as I spent most of the day on the couch.  At some point either Monday… Continue reading Grief, Loss and Thanksgiving: Part Two

Grief, Loss and Thanksgiving: Part One

Part 1: Grief – Monday, November 24, 2014 It started a week or so ago.  I hadn’t felt the baby move, but I explained it away, chalked it up to the fear and anxiety I carried over from my miscarriage last year.  I had an appointment today, so I made note to talk to the… Continue reading Grief, Loss and Thanksgiving: Part One